I was abducted by aliens , where can I get the probes removed?
I was abducted by aliens? They placed probes and pieces of metal in my brain, liver, kidneys and spine! What can I do now!?
We remove everything they put in!
Many people begin to feel helpless after an alien abduction. All hopes of a normal life, existence or having children suddenly disappear. The worst part of it all is that nobody believes you, right?
You may be asking yourself "where can I go?" "are there people that can help me?" "where the f^&$$ do I go to get all the implants removed?" . Well, The Order Of The Iron Phoenix has partnered with psychologists, numerologists, general practitioners and chemists to bring you the very best in alien probe removal and moral support!
We will personally help you cope through comprehensive "man to man" talk, psychological testing and evaluation (we wont make you eat anything, you're not insane, people get abducted by aliens all the time). We will also help you adjust to your new life after all implants and alien items have been removed.
We remove everything, from radio transmitters to alien fetuses! The best part is , if you have half decent medical coverage, it wont cost you a penny! You saw right, we wont charge you a dime! We will even begin comprehensive one on one removal procedures and coping techniques via email!
Our 25 step program has never failed, we are 499% positive we will get you back into shape, and back to your normal life!
For a limited time only, we will offer illegal alien probe removal as well. This will include removal of alien fetus, tacos and even cactus -no reasonable concern, offer or implemented item can be refused , literally -we mean absolutely every bloody thing you could possibly imagine-. So try us today!
Start here: Alien Probe Removal , you wont be sorry!