News

This section is dedicated to news as well as user-created blogs.

Fight over McDonalds leads to punctured butthole

Simmons Mugshot -- punctured butthole over cheezburgerEarly today , one man received a punctured butthole, and one woman went to prison. You see, these  two people Rebbecca Simmons, 45 and Mohammad Abukhder, 35 were at a drive-through at a local McDonalds.Naturally , Simmons (needing that g******* burger) decided to cut in line at the drive-through. When Mohammad Abukhder didn't allow this to happen , Simmons got out of her car and scratched Abukhder's car. Mohammad Abukhder responded by taking her key and calling the police.Just shortly later, Simmons took out a knife, Mohammad got out of his car, bent over, brandished his a$$hole and next thing you know, he had a knife deeply inserted inside of his rectum. Although he thoroughly enjoyed this sex act (what the f%^*?) , police ended this little joy party, sending Mohammad to the hospital for anal surgery and Simmons to jail for assault with a deadly weapon.This is...

Continue reading
  59262 Hits

Latest Posts

17 May 2019
Breaking News
Entertainment
Our dear friend and sensation Tarder Sauce AKA "Grumpy Cat" has passed away this morning at the age of 7. This came as a  worsening urinary tract infections caused the Internet sensation to be hospitalized. The owners reported that multiple...
08 February 2019
Business
The benefits to employment from home are numerous and exciting to consider. Regardless of whether you are working for yourself or someone else.Being able to do your job from the comforts of your own home can have a lot of benefits. One of the most im...
03 February 2019
Sports
 In a tense game that seemed to go on forever, a stalemate was finally broken in the fourth quarter when the New England Patriots got the first touchdown of the game. That lead would not be overtaken by the Los Angles Rams ever again. To add ins...
19 January 2019
Cthulhu Portal Updates
PhoenixTube
Cthulhu Coffee   Because sometimes the great old ones want to be remembered even when you are having your morning cup of Joe. Image credits go out to Twitter user TP98. Thank you for this illustrious Cthulhu Coffee beverage. This coffee "ex...
13 January 2019
Technology
Breaking News
In the first ever instance of roboticide, a self-driving Tesla found itself to be the culprit of a hit which landed a self-learning robot in a grave. Located in the Paradise Road district of Las Vegas, security images captured a Tesla Model S crushin...

Random News

Ok, so recently there was a registration bug that would send you multiple emails to confirm your registration (and none of them would work). This has been addressed. Also, profile pictures following r...
An Indianan man woke up early last Friday to a very atrocious site. A naked man wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and some sneakers had broken into his home and was eating his chips. The needy perp...
Early yesterday, neighbors sent in a 911 distress call to report a naked man running through a forest in central Maine. The man allegedly was running around, touching his genitals, and screaming. He w...
We would like to take the first part of this post to thank you all for being with us, we are very happy to have you with us. We have had a wonderful year, it has truly been an honor having the few of ...
A Texas man was stabbed today during a dispute with another video gamer. After a few minutes of arguing, one man pulled a Legend of Zelda Mastersword from the ground and lunged at the first man. After...