Is hitting children bad?

Hitting children is a divided topic, most people would concur that it is rather brutal to beat the living f$%# out of some poor sap with your granddaddy's 3"x3' lead pipe just to teach him a lesson.
But could we all be brainwashed by idiots, people that don't understand child psychology? People that don't understand progress?
Let me go over some of the basic reasons why people believe they should refrain from hitting their child:

1) The child is special, something harmless, something much like a pet, something that requires attention and care, therefore hitting it is an act of evil.

2) The child is defenseless, and therefore hitting it is playing the part of god, you cannot play the part of god therefore touching the child in a brutal manner is not allowed.

3) Hitting the child can cause accidental permanent damage or death.

4) The child will bide the pain, and over time, will counterattack and kill the parent?

5) The "abused" child will grow distant and violent over time.

Now, let's disprove these one by one:

1) The child is not special, it is equal in value to any other man woman or child, there is nothing special about it, it is another human, even under god it is just another human, above some animals, but not above other people. Hitting a child to discipline it is encouraged in religion, and scientifically, animals in nature discipline their young through biting, kicking, punching and scratching, it's nothing exclusive to the human species.

2) The child is not defenseless, but if you hit it enough, it might learn to defend itself.

3) Hitting a child with a lead pipe, butt end of a rifle, a baseball bat or a cement rock is probably overkill. We would suggest using a belt, it may be painful, but unless you use the iron end, it won't be fatal, or cause anything more than some bruises. Hitting the child with your cane can also work, as long as you never hit on the head, spine, joints or anything aside the buttock, really. The buttock is 80% fat, therefore damaging it is perfectly fine.

4) No, the child will grow to fear and respect you. You can kiss the child crying while you sleep at night goodbye. If the child finds out that upon crying, they will receive pain, they will stop crying, much like any other animal. If on the other hand you pick it up, cuddle with it or whatever in god's name you do to coax it, it will believe that lamenting would be equal to reward. Therefore you will snap trying to sleep or make love to your wife because the child won’t shut the %$^% up.

5) Although it has been proven that abuse to the child leads to an increase in the child being violent towards weaker children, it has never resulted in violent crime. You must beat to quell or teach the child, never to abuse… it is discipline after all. Abuse would be hitting the child for pleasure, this may result in a crossdresser that takes little boys to the basement and cooks them alive. Perpetual random abuse is a huge no no.

Usually, the perpetual abuse for pleasure is derived when a parent, be it male or female, abuses drugs and alcohol. The child is then tortured, and its brain deteriorates from the fumes of cocaine and bath salts, resulting in serial killers, and other odd abominations of nature.

Let us transition from “the psychology of hitting” to teaching you on the methodology on molding your son into a man.
We will end this article with three methods to put your son into shape:

Step 1) When your son is acting like a fruit, particularly in the supermarket, asking for things, here and there, tell them they can’t %^$#ing have it. If the child asks again, threaten them with violence. If they begin to wine, slap a decent smack across the child' right cheek with a similar force to making a clapping motion after a beautiful opera. If the child begins to cry, backhand him at full force, tech him who's boss right there and then. You can finish him off with a tomato to the head if he continues to whine.

Step 2) If your child starts playing with a lighter , electrical cord, or your wife's sex toys, take him to a dark closet, get a cable and start whipping his @ss until he cries, then lock him in the closet until he cries it off like a man, repeat by doubling strokes whenever the child commits the same action. We would suggest an extension cord, they have a bit more whip to them.

Step 3) if your child comes home, and tells you he may have gotten a friend pregnant, bust his lip, there on the spot, kick him in the ribs until he cannot breath, and slash the tires on his pos car. Then, get the lead 3x3 and beat his ass red. If your child does not sit in a corner with his thumb in his mouth in the fetal position, you have failed as a parent.