Naked Man Breaks Into Home To Eat Chips

An Indianan man woke up early last Friday to a very atrocious site. A naked man wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and some sneakers had broken into his home and was eating his chips.

The needy perpetrator, now officially released as 19 year old Andrew Wozniak, apparently broke in hungry and immediately pounced on the unsuspecting chips. The official 911 tapes literally illustrate the homeowner saying “there is a naked man in my kitchen and now he is eating my chips”.

Police were told that the homeowner physically pushed the man outside at 3 a.m. that morning. Later, police found the man walking down the street in just his underwear. A breathalyzer was issued and Wozniak failed it (although he insisted he was completely sober).

Police immediately arrested Wozniak, charging him with breaking and entering, public drunkenness, disturbing the peace, theft and lewdness.

Wozniak was then taken to a hospital due to concerns about his alcohol levels. According to eyewitness reports, Wozniak was heard yelling at doctors “I’m going to snap you both at the same time!”
And thus the drunken chip stealer made history…..